Answers
When I try to sync, the button is disabled.
First, check to ensure the iPhone/iPod touch is connected to your wireless network. To do this, tap Settings on the iPhone, then WiFi, and ensure there is a blue check mark beside your wireless network.
If the iPhone/iPod touch is connected to your wireless network, but the button remains disabled, then there may be a device on your network that is interfering with the Bonjour connection. The best solution is to setup a Computer-to-Computer network between the iPhone/iPod touch and your Mac. Instructions on doing that can be found here
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